Bringing Up Moral Children

I've been reviewing one of my favorite "textbooks" from one of my child development classes. I think it's a great (and necessary) read for every parent. I may be doing a few posts on some of it's contents. In the meantime, check out this book (Bringing Up Moral Children in an Immoral World).

Oh, and I think because it was used as a textbook, it is really inexpensive to get.:)

Let's PLAY!

I've found myself often wondering if I am doing the right things when I'm playing with my daughther. Am I giving her enough attention, not enough, creating enough structure, etc. etc....?

Do you ever wonder how to best play with your kids?

In this month's Communique (the National Association for School Psychologist's newspaper), there was a great article about Play. I wish I could just copy the whole thing and post it, but I will just put some of the key points of it.

It quotes from The Hurried Child, saying, "play is nature's way of dealing with stress for children as well as adults....As parents, we can help by investing in toys and playthings that give the greatest scope to the child's imagination." The article continues to talk about the importance of play, and in summary, it states, "through play, children explore the world around them, imagine alternatives, solve problems individually or with others, learn how to negotiate, learn how to express their feelings, and learn to be creative."

The article points out some Key Strategies to Enhance the Value of Play .

• Take time to observe your child's play
• Let your child play without you
• Give room to play (not only physical but noise space--let them move their bodies, laugh, be loud, messy, and quiet)--this will help them understand limits and boundaries
• Create opportunities for free play
• Go battery/electricity free for a day (the article talks about the modern toys that overly structure children's play, and leave little room for creativity, and notes that they should be limited)
• Play with your child
• Let your child Lead--this is not a time to instruct your child or for you to be in charge, however a time to reflect your child's feelings and reinforce their efforts.

For more information, check out this site, or this website.

Children's Books

Reading with your child is really important. A couple years ago I had the opportunity to hear Jim Trelease, author of The Read-Aloud Handbook speak on the importance of reading out loud to children. In his book he makes a point that reading out loud to children does some of the following:

• It shows that parents value reading
• It provides quality time with your child
• A pleasure connection is being made between the child and book and the child and parent
• Both the parent and child are learning something from the books they are sharing
• The adult is pouring sounds and syllables called words into the child's ear

He said the following: "It's not the toys in the house that make the difference in children's lives; it's the words in their heads. The least expensive thing we can give a child outside a hug turns out to be the most valuable: words."

I love reading books with my daughter and believe that it does give us a special connection.

So, here are some of our favorite children's books right now... (in no particular order)

Each Peach Pear Plum by Allan and Janet Ahlberg
Jamberry by Bruce Degan
B is for Bear by Roger Priddy
Quick as a Cricket by Don and Audrey Wood
Silly Sally by Audrey Wood
Heckedy Peg By Don and Audrey Wood
The HICCUPotmus by Aaron Zenz
How I Became a Pirate by Melinda Long and David Shannon
The Very Busy Spider by Eric Carle
The Very Hungry Catepillar by Eric Carle
Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What do you See? by Eric Carle

***What are your favorite books you read with your child??

Teaching the difficult to teach

This post is not really directed towards your own children, but rather if you are in a position where you have the opportunity to work with difficult children. (So for all you teachers out there...)

Again, this thought comes from the book, Becoming Attached.

"...it may be hard for the insecurely attached youngster to find such an alternate attachment figure because the strategies that he has adopted for getting along in the world tend to alienate him from the very people who might otherwise be able to help. The behavior of the insecurely attached child...often tries the patience of peers and adults alike. it elicts reactions that repeatedly reconfirm the child's distorted view of the world..."

"But if adults are sensitive to the anxious child's concerns, they can break through."

I love this last little part. I think this is the key for anyone, including working with your own child...being sensitive to the child's needs. A warm and responsive parent is the most important thing that a child needs!