Tantrums and Aggression in Children

I wanted to share an interesting thought from a book I've been reading (Becoming Attached).

This is concerning hatred and aggression (especially directed towards parents):

"Being allowed to have these feelings without being overwhelmed by guilt or anxiety helps the child to accept the ambivalence that is part of every close relationship and gives him the confidence that he can control his negative impulses, that they do not have to destroy him or those he loves."

"...even if his extreme negative feelings are too much for him, they are not too much for her; she can "hold" them, and through his relationship with her he will learn to manage them one day himself."